DENVER — Anne Marie Hochhalter is described by her loved ones in many ways: resilient, tenacious, and independent. But above all, she was a compassionate person who used her voice to advocate on behalf of others.
Hochhalter was a survivor of the 1999 mass shooting at Columbine High School, which claimed the lives of 12 students and one teacher. She was shot and left paralyzed from the waist down.
Hochhalter, 43, was found dead in her Westminster home on Sunday. Her cause of death has not been released.
"I suspect it had something to do with some complications from her original injury," said Sue Townsend, who grew very close with Hochhalter after the shooting.
Sue and her husband, Rick Townsend, met with Denver7 on Tuesday to discuss the life and legacy Hochhalter leaves behind.
"She was her best advocate, and she advocated for others who had disabilities, and she was a compassionate friend," Sue said about Hochhalter. "She'd been through so much, and I think that taught her compassion. And you could talk to her about anything, and people did."
The Townsends planned to have lunch with Hochhalter on Sunday but said she did not reply to their Saturday text messages to confirm. When they could not reach Hochhalter on Sunday, they called for a welfare check.
"Everybody knows her as one of the victims of Columbine, but she never saw herself as a victim. She was a survivor," Sue said.
The Townsends met Hochhalter through the Columbine tragedy. Lauren Townsend was one of the 12 students killed in the mass shooting.
"She was a wonderful young woman and a very bright girl," Rick said about his daughter. "I never had trouble sharing stories about Lauren. I had people tell me, 'We don't want to make you think about it because, you know, it will make you sad.' I always think about it, so it's nothing new if you ask me."
Sue read Hochhalter's story and offered to take her to doctor's appointments or physical therapy once a week. That blossomed into a friendship that felt more like family.
"We call her our acquired daughter. She's just become part of our family," Sue said.
The Townsends were stunned by Hochhalter's passing. So was her younger brother, Nathan Hochhalter.
"I know that she's been having some medical issues, but you're just not ready for it because she has bounced back in the past from these problems," Nathan said.
Reflecting on their childhood, Nathan said his sister was always the "good kid." She got good grades, stayed out of trouble, and always protected him.
Nathan was also at Columbine High School on the day of the shooting.
"I learned how to compartmentalize really well," Nathan said with a small smile. "Us losing our mom shortly after that, it was just like, when are these punches going to stop?"
He continued, "We both found ways to give back. Her approach was very supportive to her communities, her friends, her family."
In 2016, Hochhalter penned a letter to the mother of one of the gunmen. The letter says in part, "Bitterness is like swallowing a poison pill and expecting the other person to die." She finished the letter by forgiving the gunman's mother and wishing her the best.
Loved ones call the letter another sign of the compassion Hochhalter showed throughout her life.
The Townsends said they would often share memories of Lauren with Hochhalter. They now intend to do the same as they remember Hochhalter.
"We had Anne Marie was over for brunch with the family on Christmas Day, and there's Anne Marie and my daughter, Kathy, and our granddaughter, Sarah, and they're kind of gathered around here, all talking at once, all three of them, and I'm wondering, 'How can you understand what the other one's saying?' But they did, and they were talking and laughing and having the best time," Sue said, thinking about Christmas 2024. "I thought, I just want to freeze this moment because it was so heartwarming to see them enjoying each other so much."
In thinking of his favorite memory, Rick recalled a time when the family took a trip to Hawaii and he helped Hochhalter into the ocean.
"She'd never been in the ocean before, which is one thing she always wanted to do," Rick said. "We were out there for two hours. She still didn't want to get out of the water. She didn't feel any pain at all the whole time she was in that water, which was unusual. She struggled a lot with nerve pain from her spinal cord injury, and I think that time in the lagoon was a happy place for her."
When asked what legacy Hochhalter leaves behind, the Townsend's did not hesitate to answer.
"Don't ever give up. Don't ever give up," the two said. "You'll run into hard times, but just keep going at it. You can get it through and come out the other side better."
- To mark 25 years, Denver7 had lengthy conversations with survivors and family members. In many of those conversations, we were asked to focus on the hope that came from Columbine, rather than that one dark day. "The beauty that came from Columbine," a 30-minute, commercial-free broadcast, is a collection of those stories – some you may have never heard before. Watch our coverage through this dedicated page or in the video player below.
Denver7 is committed to making a difference in our community by standing up for what's right, listening, lending a helping hand and following through on promises. See that work in action, in the videos above.